I f you’ve been exploring our range of sex toys or have been reading up on kinky things to do in the bedroom, you may have noticed a term that you may not be familiar with namely pegging.
What is pegging?
If you are not very adventurous in the bedroom or prefer rather “traditional” roles in your sexual relationship, then you will most likely be a complete stranger to pegging, but don’t worry you are not alone. Pegging, quite simply is the sex act where a man (or woman) is being anally penetrated by a woman wearing a strap on dildo.
The first time we really got to find out about strap-ons and women coming out in public saying that “fucking your boyfriend in the ass is fun” was in Bend Over Boyfriend (or BOB for short). Bend Over Boyfriend was a revolutionary series of sex education videos by Shar Rednour and Jackie Strano, which were released in 1989 by the sex toy company Good Vibrations.
The series guided the viewer step by step through the process of how to have anal sex with a strap-on dildo by means of role-play and fantasy. It also gave suggestions as to how you could broach the topic of anal sex with your partner and debunked some of the most common myths of anal sex.
Bend Over Boyfriend is generally considered to be the first in-depth video series that taught people exactly how to have anal sex, without it being patronising or sleazy.
Recent more open acceptance of sex and sex toys in the media means that pegging has also made an appearance in a couple of more mainstream tv programmes. Most notably in one of the recent episodes of Broad City on Comedy Central. Where a minor misunderstanding about switching things up between Abbi and her neighbour Jeremy leads to some new discoveries for our leading lady.
Why is it called pegging?
The term “pegging” officially entered our vocabulary in 2001 after Dan Savage, the sex advice columnist and author of books such as “It gets better” and “American Savage” held a competition to come up with a new name.
A total of 12,103 people took part and made the choice between the 3 terms “bob”, “punt” and “peg”, with the latter being a clear victor, putting “pegging” firmly on the sexual map.
How popular is pegging?
Here at Kinkybuddies, we have noticed that strap on dildos and harnesses have been a consistent seller and make up an important part of our sales. Over the past few years, we have seen an important increase in the number of couples that have expressed an interest in using strap ons for female to male role play.
It is safe to say that as we become more and more adventurous in the bedroom that more people will try pegging.
Do people actually enjoy pegging their partner?
Pegging is still seen by some as a bit of a taboo topic and isn’t that widely accepted by men and women who haven’t really heard about it. Luckily the majority of people we spoke to who have actually pegged their partner admitted that they thoroughly enjoy the experience.
Each has their own personal reason why they enjoy it, but most say that it is so different from their regular sex and creates a different kind of intimacy.
They confessed that pegging puts them in an exciting sexual situation they don’t usually find themselves in as a woman. Having the roles reversed in such a drastic way gave them a more dominant position during sex, mixing aspects of intimacy, power and control they normally don’t experience in vanilla sex.
Some women also like the visual stimulation and the sensation of seeing their partner’s reaction while they peg them, to watch how much they enjoy it and knowing that they are in charge over what their partner is feeling.
Why do heterosexual men like pegging?
It is easy to fall into the trap to assume that if a guy likes to be penetrated that he must be gay, but that simply isn’t true. Whether you like anal stimulation or not has absolutely nothing to do with being gay.
Truth is, men have been enjoying anal sex for millennia so I think it is safe to say that being penetrated via their backside is pretty enjoyable for most guys otherwise they wouldn’t be doing it … right? Whether that penetration is being done by another guy or a woman is pretty irrelevant don’t you think?
The difference with regular anal sex and being pegged with a dildo is that the latter offers a lot more opportunities for variety. There are so many different dildos available in any shape, size, texture, soft, hard, with or without vibration, the choice is endless.
Whats more, because some of the attachments available are specifically designed to target and stimulate the prostate gland during sex, many men report that the orgasms they achieve while pegging are the best orgasms they’ve ever experienced.
How do you start pegging?
If you are curious and want to try pegging for the first time yourself then we have put together a few handy tips that will help you get on the way.
Step 1: Find yourself the right pegging toys
Pegging is quite an active way of having sex and does require sex toys that are suited for it. Pegging toys usually come in two big parts: the harness and the dildo.
The harness is the part that the woman straps on and which serves to support and keep the dildo in place. It is essential that it fits snugly round your hips and that it will do a good job of supporting and keeping the dildo in place.
If you look around online you will quickly notice that there are a wide variety of harnesses on the market ranging from elaborate contraptions with straps and buckles all the way to harnesses that look like a pair of boxer shorts that you can just slip on.
Regardless of the type of harness you choose it is important to make sure that it fits comfortably without moving around too much. Otherwise you won’t fully enjoy the experience.
There are some good pegging beginners kits on the market, which will do the job, but from our own experience we know that once you get a taste for pegging you will want to upgrade to something a bit more sturdy. I would suggest to aim for a more mid range harness like the All American Whoppers by Nasstoys.
Dildos are where the pegging fun really starts. Dildos that are suitable for use with a harness can be easily recognised because of their large flared base. This helps to secure them firmly inside the rings of the harness.
Most strap on dildos have a flat base so that they sit flush with the harness, but some versions have little bumps or ridges which will grind against the clitoris with each trust. Some even are double ended so that both partners get stimulated during pegging. It all comes down to your personal preference and mood.
If you aren’t 100% sure that the dildo you are looking at is suitable for harness use then you can always ask the seller for more information.
I know that it can be tempting to go for the impressive big dildos you see in adverts or in porn, but if you are a first-time pegger we would recommend that you don’t. Instead opt for a dildo that is maybe a bit smaller, thiner and with a curved design. The curved design will help to reach a man’s prostate, making the experience even more intense. Because pegging dildos are easily interchangeable, you can always go for a bigger dildo once you get more experienced and know what you like.
Step 2: Get lubed up.
As with all anal sex, using a good quality lube is very important. Use a generous amount of lubrication and don’t hesitate to reapply as necessary.
Since you are using a dildo it is important to make sure that you choose a lube that is suitable for use with your toy. Most strap on dildos are made of silicone so a water based lubricant is recommended.
It is important to not just lube your toy, but also your partners anus to make sure that things go smoothly and without injuries. Getting tube inside your anus can be a bit tricky so use an anal lube with a specialised applicator head or a handy lube applicators like the lube shooter, which are made especially for anal lubrication. Using them will make sure you get it in the right spot.
Step 3: Relax and enjoy.
Half the fun of pegging is sharing the experience with your partner. It can be an amazing way to spice up your love life and to engage in some role play. So start slow, communicate and see where you can take things together.
Do you enjoy a bit of pegging with your partner or are you thinking about strapping on that strap-on, then please feel free to comment below. And as usual, if you liked this post then please help us get the word out about the site by sharing on Facebook or re tweeting.